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Thursday, November 21, 2024

I Like Thursday # 427 saying goodbye


 



this song says so much...  (I would give everything I own to have you back)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlOwOFJJ-RI


My beautiful boy... is gone. 
we took him to the ER Vet last Friday hoping for an iv and some meds.
 It all happened so quickly and I'm still in shock. just two weeks ago he was still playing running and eating.

We had tried to entice him to eat  but he wouldn't even lick almond butter off a pill. He drank bowls and bowls of water and it poured out of him.  


 The ERvet said he was not processing his water, so he was dehydrated. Then the sonogram  showed prostate cancer that had spread to bladder and small intestine and maybe his leg,  causing the limp that developed one week earlier.
 It was a very aggressive cancer in dogs, you can't do surgery, and chemo and radiation might buy you 3-6 months before it returns after treatment.  He had three obvious tumors in three organs, one was pushing on his urethra so his bladder might burst at any moment.

he continued to refuse all food even beef broth on our fingers. We brought him home for one more night.  he's just 7 I said. Don't take him from me. 
 
He had lost 14 lbs out of 70,mostly in the last two weeks.  
Saturday afternoon, the mobile vet to administer the euthanasia on the back porch, we knew what we must do but were still in disbelief. 
 he died Sat afternoon , leaving me without my comfort and soul companion, taking all joy from the house. I have to live with the guilt of not catching it sooner although all reports say it wouldn't matter for life expectancy. No good treatment here

he was only 7, I expected him to live to 14. Less than 24 hours after finding out he had cancer he was  gone. Now it's just cleaning up, throwing out the bedding he peed on the last 5 days, throwing out medicine, toys food and looking at the Christmas toys I bought to give this year.

it's empty in our home now.

I researched cancer in dogs and saw a recent finding (May 2024) was to stop giving tap water to dogs and cats. The fluoride is causing bladder cancer.  We gave him filtered water the last year or so not even knowing the findings.   

my chiropractor said, (I had to go in this week from lifting him so much),

 I must try to be grateful for having him the last 7 years, and no time is long enough with those you love

I'm trying. 
I'm grateful I had the last night and he didn't die at the ER. I'm grateful for the hour we spent on the couch together the last day. I'm grateful for that final walk through the neighborhood and Milo pulled ahead a bit, sniffing.

he cannot be replaced, he was the smart and perceptive, the funniest, the most protective to the end (our last walk he warned me someone was coming up behind us) the cuddliest, the kindest, and best for me. I cry all the time. 

I hope to write his stories. I hope to write some memories here of his antics, we've been remembering his stories the last 5 days since the unbelievable happened. I want to honor him. 

He used to know when it was time to remove baked goods from the oven, come to stand next to me in the kitchen, if daddy came over Milo quietly stepped in front of the daddy and looked up at me. 
" do I get a piece?"  He loved his cookies!

44 comments:

  1. Oh LeeAnna I am so sorry for you! I'm sitting here crying with you.

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  2. My heart breaks for you, LeeAnna and for your husband too. I am so sorry for your loss of your beautiful Milo♥

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  3. My heart aches for your loss. Such a shock. You loved him to the moon and back and he loved you as much. Weep for the loss and live for the love.

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  4. So sorry to hear this sad news, LeeAnna. What a special dog Milo was, a real bright spot to have around. My condolences -- may you be comforted by the many happy memories you have of him.

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  5. no... we cry so hard... no words, just tears and tears for your wonderful boy...

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  6. I sure wasn't expecting to see this today and I know you weren't expecting it either. I'm so, so sorry to hear about your precious Milo. All losses are horrible but the unexpected loss of someone so dear is just crushing. Milo was so special, we could feel that from afar. Love and hugs from all of us.

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  7. I’m so sorry. What a loss. He was a lovely doggie. Thanks for sharing him with us. Sending hugs

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  8. Oh LeeAnna, I'm so so sorry. This is just heartbreaking. All the love to you and DH. I loved watching Milo's adventures through your posts.

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  9. I'm so sorry, LeeAnna. Milo was a beautiful soul, and I always loved your stories about him on the blog. So glad I got to meet him and pet him a few times. Take care, and know that we are all out here sending our love to you.

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  10. It is never easy to say good-bye to our pets whether we know way in advance or it comes suddenly. I am so sorry as I know you haven't been feeling well lately. Milo had a wonderful life and he knew how much you loved him. He appreciated every minute with you whether walking or cuddling. I don't know what else to say to you because I know how I'd be feeling (have felt before) but I wish you peace & comfort.

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  11. I’m so sorry to hear this. He had a wonderful life with you. We never get enough time with them.

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  12. So sorry for you and your hubby. It's never easy. Our pets are a big part of our lives. ((HUGS)) Take care of each other.
    Sandy's Space

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  13. We are all shedding tears with you today. I loved Milo and I love you

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  14. We are thankful that Milo had you in his life. Thanks for joining Angel Brian's Thankful Thursday Blog Hop. I sent you an email.

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  15. I am so very sorry to read about your Milo's passing.
    What a handsome boy he was....Just reading about him I could tell he lived and loved every moment of every day to the fullest.
    Hugs Cecilia

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  16. Oh, LeeAnna I am so very sorry. My heart breaks for you.

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  17. I'm so sorry, LeeAnna. I wish I could give you a hug. Milo was so loved. Take care.

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  18. We are so sorry for the loss of sweet Milo. We hope that in time t he memories will drive away some of the pain.

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  19. We are so very sorry for your loss LeAnna
    xoxo,
    Beth, Rosy & Sunny

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  20. Oh, Leeanna, I know how devastated you and Drew are. No words can soothe your pain. Please take care of each other.
    Pat

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  21. You've had such trying times. I can't believe he's gone. Milo was a lucky dog to have found you two. My condolences on your loss.

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  22. This is just unbelievable! Milo!! Your beautiful, smart boy. I am so sorry LeeAnna. What a wonderful life he had with the two of you. No one else could have been more perfect for him. Please take care of each other.

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  23. What a beautiful and beloved boy. He died as he lived: with those he loved and who loved him, and yet far too young. Godspeed, Milo.

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  24. Oh LeeAnna! I am so sorry! My heart is breaking for you and your husband. I loved reading the voice you gave him! Please know that all your friends have you in our thoughts. Hope you can write his story one day!

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  25. Dear LeeAnna, I don't know what to say. I will miss Milo's Moments. I'm sorry this happened. We open our hearts to these friends, and so much can go wrong. He was a dear one though, such a sweet face. I wish you peace. Anne

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  26. Oh LeeAnna, how devastating for you and your husband. I'm so, so sorry you are both going through this impossibly difficult time. Your Milo was a beautiful and sweet boy.

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  27. I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope you can write his story when the time is right. And of course, I would like to read of Milo on Thursdays. All the best! Regula

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  28. After losing our little Milly last month I really know the pain you are going through. He was such a beautiful dog and you gave him a wonderful life. Sending you biggest hugs.
    Annie x

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  29. I am so sorry to read of your loss. It's so hard with furry pet members because they cannot tell you that they don't feel right and hide it so well. My hugs and prayers for you. Remember the happy times with him and know that you gave him a good life with you.

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  30. I am so sorry for your loss. Milo was a very special dog - his personality was wonderful. It is so hard when they leave us. We will be facing the same in a few days. May your memories comfort you both.

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  31. dear LA, so sorry to hear of the passing of Milo. he gave so much joy and humor to you guys. and so quickly gone. animals do hide there discomfort well. Milo was truly a beautiful and sweet boy. I 'm so sorry for your heartbreaking loss. sonja

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  32. I am so sorry for the loss of your handsome boy. X0

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  33. My heart breaks for you, LeeAnna. Sending quilty hugs!

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  34. I am incredibly sorry to hear this. I am sending all of my positive vibes your way.

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  35. I am so sorry for the loss of dear Milo. His memory will be a blessing just as his life was a blessing. It happened so quickly. With this cancer there was nothing you could have done that you didn’t do. Milo was a good dog and he always knew he was loved.

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  36. Oh, Milo, how sad for your family. We send you love. No words suffice for things like this. A beautiful doggy. Really beautiful...

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  37. I haven’t checked in in a long time and this was not the best time, for sure. I know how much you loved him and he loved you. Please get some comfort knowing that he had the best possible life with you. My sympathies.

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  38. I was looking at an old post on my blog from 2021, and you had found my blog via an image search, and kindly left a comment. So I came here today and I see this heartbreaking news. I am so very sorry.

    We lost our darling boy, Mulder, to lymphoma last year. He was diagnosed at 7, we tried chemo as we had caught it early, no surgery was needed, and he was feeling well, his only symptom was the lymph glands. He did OK on the chemo, though he did throw up and feel like crap for a day after his weekly treatments. It went into remission, but it came back only a few months later. He died in May of 2023, about 6 weeks after his 8th birthday.

    Like you, I feel robbed. I want him back. It hurts so much (still) and I cry about it a lot. I am so sorry this happened to your beautiful boy.

    <3 ~ J

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  39. I have thought of you and Milo and the wonderful life you had with each other. Nothing will replace him right now, the first few weeks are just awful. You loved him and he loved you. It will be wonderful to read his stories when you write them, when you are ready. A big virtual hug from Maine.

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  40. I'm so sorry you lost your precious sweet Milo top that evil Cancer.
    He was well and deeply loved. You made ever so many memories,even in his way too short life.
    Sending huge hugs.

    I made you a memento and it's on our blog right now, and I also sent it to you via email to the address you have in your 'contact me' space.

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  41. They never stay with us long enough. I'm so very sorry for your loss, LeeAnna. Sending your tender thoughts of comfort to you and Drew. Milo was the sweetest boy and will be sorely missed. 💔

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