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| "who's that following me?" |
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| we are in the daily monsoon season and got drenched in a pop up storm yesterday |
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| er, what is it? |
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| old cow yard flag! found in the garage |
Mama: well, best leave it be darling, want something for breakfast?
this week's conversation starter
4. Prioritize your favorites here, one two three:
TV, books, movies
1. TV right now
2. Books really #1 as well, equal to TV for escape, only I have trouble staying with the book as my mind wanders now, or I fall asleep
3. movies would be nice but are too long to focus on to the end
life is incredibly difficult right now.... my husband found out he was autistic, 10 months ago, and he's angry, resentful, demanding, and erratic. He left us at lunch out of the blue less than two months ago. Just announced at lunch, I'm leaving you forever
He is working hard to find me at fault for his feelings.
this is opposite to his personality for the previous 30 + years
he is secretive and uncommunicative, blaming, then sometimes kind to me and informative
so life has flipped me over like a turtle and I can't find my feet.
I am a person who seeks security so they can relax and create art from their heart
if you can, please pray for me to have direction, make good decisions, and withstands the loneliness and despair
for now, noticing the good things
I'm so sorry for the challenges you're facing at home. I hope that your husband (and you!) can access counseling/therapy to address the cause and find a solution.
ReplyDeleteLeeanna, I'm so sorry to learn of your current, distressing situation. You bet I will pray for you to have the strength you need to come through this upheaval safe and sound. Hugs to you, my friend. Will be thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteYou have my prayers for strength and for peace of mind. Hugs!!
ReplyDeleteMy ranking - books, TV, movies. I must have something to read always. And I admit I watch movies on TV.
Finding the small good things in life is a good antidote to the hard things you're going through. We all hope and pray that life gets better for you. I'm so glad you have Alfie to take you on walks and sniff out the mysteries in the yard!
ReplyDeleteIt happens sometimes when there has been a stroke.... complete personality changes. I'm so sorry. Have his Dr. check for that, he should be on meds so he doesn't have more of them. My heart is with you.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear of the stress you and your husband have been going through. I would also suggest having a doctor check him out. Could it be early-onset dementia or Alzheimer's? Those conditions can change personalities and make people delusional and suspicious, etc. Praying for you!
ReplyDeleteIt's very wise to tell your Mama that something needs investigating, you never know these days Alfie! Thanks for joining Angel Brian's Thankful Thursday Blog Hop!
ReplyDeleteI know you are Christian but sometimes Buddhist philosophy and practice helps (it is not a religion but a way of connecting to your soul): "The way some one treats you is a reflection of their habits, wounds, insecurities and state of mind. It's hardly ever about you. Their actions belong to them, but your peace belongs to you." Late life diagnosis of neuro-diversity can break a dam - a life time of not understanding why but playing along in a game you don't know the rules for. I have two female friends and my brother married to spouses who got late life answers to why they always felt like misfits and constantly masking their anxieties. For some a huge relief and a time of relationship growth. I'm really sad to read that it has been such a warzone for you. Use your creativity to express your own feelings and reactions. You don't have to share it but get it out there and look at it. Handwrite stuff every day - not coherent stuff just anything you think or feel. Burn it later if you want but keep processing in words and colour and movement - and hug your dog loads. Thinking of you.
ReplyDeleteMy prayers are ascending for you, LeeAnna♥
ReplyDeleteI will hold a good thought for you my friend. Sometimes difficulties are just signposts on the way to somewhere better. I sure hope so. Aloha!
ReplyDeleteMany big strong mushy hugs to you. Praying for all three of you!
ReplyDeleteI am sending up many prayers for you during this time. Life challenges all of us and it can be difficult. Thank you for taking the time to link up.
ReplyDeleteI've been thinking about you often and sending healing energy to you as you process this difficult time. I'm thankful you have Alfie to keep you company and given you a distraction from the chaos.
ReplyDeletePat